Noanyone to share the divinity of my gift Absent. The voice of
encouragement and gratitude self prescribed. Self inflicted. Friendship
redundant until required. Empty North to South. Acknowledgment
disfigured with anti praise and unacknowledgment. Drowning in
layers. Abused by life’s synthetic monotony, unrequired.
Bind my hands behind my back. Cutting. Strip me of my voice my
tension Shed away the layers of my raped soul. Spirit bowing under the
weight of busy chaos Solitude my worst deamon Anger Anger Anger Anger
Anger Frustration
I walk naked alone with nature Miles and miles and miles Solitude my
best friend Just to feel free.
Love
You have no idea to side step this rat race Just how bloody lucky you
are. Today
Yet tomorrow will be different again.
May 09
The Post Natal Blues
Deep, deep inside my own thoughts, I hate everyone, I hate the
world And I am angry with everyone else. So angry don’t think I’ll ever
feel anger free again. The pressures of modern life fill the place with
emotional pain Unless you are financially up And then life’s yours to
gain. I am animated, agitated, passionate and inarticulate. When I try
expressing myself, it’s like constantly trying to fight my way out of a
cobweb, And at the end of the night It has all come out wrong what I
said So I write it down instead Feels like I’m living but I’m
dead Everyone keeps saying, ‘Well at least you’ve got your health’ But
what they should say is, ‘At least you are physically well’ Emotionally it
is hell. I am alone all day long With beautiful toddler, but not my only
soul mate, John He is working all the God sent hours Just to pay for
food and bills Financially it’s getting harder The isolation and the
loneliness builds I wish like Indian families we were responsible for our
own Emotionally, physically, financially there For old and young,
sharing, care Everyone says ‘We have all been there you know’ Well if
you’ve frigging been there, support me through the lows Emotional comfort
or a reassuring hug The only love I feel I get is from the babe or
pup The highs are too high; the lows are so low My Granddad’s
Equilibrium Theory is the place I wanna go Cheers Granddad, even though
you’ve gone to heaven You help me more than those on earth If just for
a minute we could hug It would be more than money’s
worth.
1998
Sally Bowles
Once upon a time Not so long ago. A naive girl was kidnapped Of
her not so virgin soul.
She acted like a woman Defended all her pride. Transformed in to a
grown up All her childlike ways had died.
She fought so hard to get them back Inside her hate just grew They
never saw her laugh or smile They only saw her blue.
Then one day a special gift Rewarded from above Her childlike ways
returned for she Remembered how to love.
And so lived happily ever after.
1990
Moon
He was so peaceful Like a foetus draped in ebony.
Africa at its darkest With no life mapped out.
We vote to be freed from our prison. Cant handle the complications.
Want to be a little girl Want to have a cake Want to eat that
cake…
1989
Little lady blues
The body of a woman The mind of a child Sophisticated motions So
uncontrived.
The purring of a lady The screaming of a child Hips so slim Forced
so wide
A tear for the past A grasp for the future What about now You
bastard, how could ya?
1989
Ever Wished
Ever wished to be kissed by the lips of freedom?
To rest your weary head on the soft undergrowth of a flowery bed.
To be captured by the endearing warmth of the suns comforting arms.
To drift away on smooth ripples and be as free as a silver wave.
To be lost in the land of laughter and lambs.
To lay in a velvet lined coffin of flowers and fern.
To be caressed and protected by a dreamy compassionate fog.
To breath in only the sweet aura of a misty musk
To see the fairytale dawn, watch the fairytale dusk.
Ever wished to slip so deep in to the inviting heart of your favourite most
peaceful dream
That you never wake.
Ever been wished to be kissed by the lips of freedom
I wished…
1989
The fiend
You take children when they are most vulnerable And mould their
hips. You teach them like a clown But they are only guinea pigs for your
tricks. They see light at the end of the tunnel But need your directions
a lie. You promise to be their favourite friend And then………….you make
them cry.
1989
The Rose
Rose so red and clear and strong I see you only for what you
are Without noticing that underneath you aren’t so clear You’re fresh
not pure I mean your pure but not in a way that you are mine. You have
so many layers which aren’t so fine as how I wished But as a rose I love
you still Nothings easy when complications
spill
1988
Be strong
The wind it often blows to hard But the trees have no say Just simply
sway Their tender arms flying in the air.
The sun it often shines to hot But the earth it has no where to
turn Just simply burns Lying quite still , waiting for the night.
But when the light does sweetly shine The earth cant wait to be
caressed Just simply rests Looking forward to the dawn
The trees stand strong upon the lawn. They have no choice but to
receive The power of sun. The volume of breeze.
But still the trees stay rooted firm And still the earth must surely
turn Gods given life to such a place And live it must which ever
phase.
Deep
For you I wait endlessly in my sub conscience For you I stand helplessly
in midnight fog For you I hurt emotionally and bare the pain I am
unaware of any desires to sleep with you I am told I am obsessed with
you I am told I crave your affection I am asked “Am I in love with
you?” And all I know is I don’t know.
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